bad meets evil lyrics

I reckon you ain't familiar with these here parts
You know, there's a story behind that there saloon
Twenty years ago, two outlaws took this whole town over
Sheriffs couldn't stop 'em, quickest damn gun slinger I've ever seen
Got murdered in cold blood, that ol' saloon there was their lil' home
Away from home, they say the ghosts of bad and evil still live
In that tavern and on a quiet night, you can still hear the footsteps of Slim Shady and Royce Da Five-Nine

I don't speak, I float in the air wrapped in a sheet
I'm not a real person, I'm a ghost trapped in a beat
I translate when my voice is read through a seismograph
And a noise is bred, picked up and transmitted through Royce's head
Trapped him in his room, possessed him and hoist his bed
Till the evilness flows through his blood like poisonous lead
Told him each one of his boys is dead
I asked him to come to the dark side, he made a choice and said

Who hard? yo I done heard worse
We can get in two cars and accelerate at each other
To see which one'll swerve first
Two blind bandits panic, whose mental capacity holds
That of a globe on top of nine other planets
Kissed the cheek of the devil, intelligence level is hellier than
Treble peakin' on speakers in the ghetto

Dismissal, I'm not a fair man, disgraced the race of a atheist
Intercepting missiles wit my bare hands like a patriot
One track sliced without swords, I buried the Christ corpse
In my past life when the black knight mounted the white horse
And stay over-worked, its like the Nazis in the nations
Collaborating, attemptin' to take over the earth

'Cuz this is what happens when bad meets evil
We hit the trees till we look like Vietnamese people
He's evil, and I'm bad like Steve Segal
Above the law 'cuz I don't agree wit police either
We ain't eager to be legal
So please leave me with the keys to your jeep eagle

I breathe ether in three amounts
When I stab myself in the knee with a diseased needle
Releasin' rage on anybody in squeezing range
Cold enough to make the seasons change into freezing rain
He's insane, no I'm not, I just want to shoot up
And I'm pissed off 'cuz I can't find a decent vain

The disaster wit dreads
I'm bad enough to commit suicide and survive long enough
To kill my soul after I'm dead
When in danger it's funny actually my flavor's similar to a waiter
'Cuz I serve any stranger with money
I spray a hundred, man until they joint chains
While slippin' bullets at point blank range like they was punches
Piss on a flag and burn it, murder you then come to your funeral

Serve this lobbyist, strangle your body then confirm you
Whippin' human ass, throwin' blows crackin' jaws
Wit my fists wrapped in gauze, dipped in glue and glass
I'm blazin' MC's, at the same time amazin' MC's
Somehow MC's ain't that eye-brow raisin' to me
From all of angles of us, flash a mack loud enough
To cast a avalanche and bust till volcanoes erupt

Hello? Billy, aiyyo what's up
We're comin' to get you
Stop, they know it's us

I used to be a loudmouth, remember me?
I'm the one who burned your house down
Well I'm out now, and this time
I'm comin' back to blow your house up
And I ain't gone leave you a window to jump out of
Give me two fat tabs and three shrooms
And you won't see me like fat people in steam rooms
And when I go to hell and I'm gettin ready to leave
I'ma put air in a bag and charge people to breathe

'Cuz this is what happens when bad meets evil
And we hit the trees till we look like Vietnamese people
He's Evil, and I'm Bad like Steve Segal
Against peaceful, see you in hell for the sequel
We'll be waitin', See you in hell
Wall Street, Royce Da Five-Nine, Slim Shady
See you in hell for the sequel, bye bye
Bad meets evil, what? Till next time

{And so that's the story when bad meets evil
Two of the most wanted individuals in the county
Made Jesse James and Billy the Kid look like law-abiding citizens
It's too bad they had to go out the way they did
Got shot in the back comin' out of that ol' saloon
But their spirits still live on till this day
Wait, did y'all hear that?}